Choosing your groomsmen is a crucial part of planning a wedding.
Often, these are the groom’s friends and the people he is close to.
Unfortunately, many men find out during this time they don’t have as many friends as they thought.
So, What Should You Do If the Groom Has No Friends for A Best Man Or Groomsmen?
If the groom does not have a friend to be his best man, there are various alternatives he can try. For instance, he can ask an authority figure in their life to be their best man. This could be their teacher or mentor. He can also ask his brother, soon to be brother in law or father, to take up this role. Or if he has a past best friend he really likes, he can also reach out and ask them to be his best man.
What matters is that the person chosen knows the groom and understands the role of a best man, like arranging a bachelor party and helping him to get ready, among others.
If the groom doesn’t have enough friends to be his groomsmen, a good option would be not having them at his wedding.
But if he values groomsmen, he can choose people close to him, even if it is one or two. Plus, it doesn’t have to be men. He can groomswomen as that’s a thing nowadays.
But it would be best for the bride to reduce her bridesmaids to match her brides with the groomsmen the groom manages to find. If he finds only two people, consider having two brides.
And if he has no one to ask, but the bride has friends to be her maids, she can let them participate in doing bridesmaids’ duties without having the title’ bridesmaids.’
That will help the groom feel better and not worry about the lack of friends.
Four Ways To Get Groomsmen When You Don’t Have Lots of Friends
A wedding is a good opportunity to know how many true friends you have. If you don’t have friends and the bride keeps asking about your groomsmen lineup, don’t sweat. Here are some things you can do:
1. Ask Help from Your Mom
Sometimes your bride may have many friends, and you only have two or three guys you are close with. Instead of overthinking things, ask for help from your mom.
She may have friends with sons who she could talk to for this role.
2. Choose Your Colleagues
It happens that the only people you interact with are guys at work.
After that, you don’t really get to see many people. In that case, think about the guys you work with and are semi-friends, then pick him.
Choose someone you usually talk to about other things unrelated to work.
But please note that there are some chances they may decline since you are not close.
3. Go Without Groomsmen
Sometimes you can stress a lot about your groomsmen or best man and forget that you don’t need these people for your wedding to happen.
Having them is for sure a bonus addition and makes the wedding lively, but if you don’t have anyone for this role, don’t stress about it.
Be comfortable with walking down the aisle alone and wait for your bride.
But if you choose this route, please inform your fiancé as soon as possible. You need her to know about the lack of groomsmen so that you don’t plan for them.
4. Hire Someone
The last option is to find someone and hire them to be your best man.
This could be your best shot if you are desperate and don’t have anyone to call.
But you need to ask yourself if you are comfortable with having a strange person at your wedding.
Remember, weddings are intimate affairs celebrated with people close to the bride and the groom. But if you don’t mind, go for it.
A Guide to Choosing Your Groomsmen
Choosing your best man or groomsmen can be challenging, especially if you have lots of loved ones to consider.
On the one hand, you want people you are really close to for this role. But on the other, you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings.
Several steps can help you choose your groomsmen and put the best steps without feeling like you’re ranking your friends.
Here are some things to help you out:
1. Plan And Talk To Your Partner
Before making your groomsmen list, talk to your spouse first.
You need their input on the people to choose and how big your wedding party should be.
Go over with your spouse about the size of the wedding, the people to choose, people your partner wouldn’t prefer to be on the lineup, and whether they have someone they want to be included to be your groomsmen.
2. Think About The Size Of The Wedding And The Expectations
Usually, the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen is the same.
In these setups, the maids and groomsmen walk together down the aisle.
Therefore, having an equal number makes sense.
But this is not mandatory.
That is why you and your spouse should decide the number of groomsmen and bridesmaids you’ll have so no one is left out.
You can agree on the right number beforehand so you don’t go overboard.
3. Decide Who Makes It To The Lineup And Who Doesn’t
We know you don’t want to hurt anyone or make someone feel misjudged. So how, then, do you choose your groomsmen?
- Put your family first, i.e., siblings and close relative
- Choose mutual friends with who both you and your spouse share
- Pick current friends, even if they are old friends
- Consider responsible friends who will help you during the wedding
But remember that no matter how much thought you put into this, someone’s feelings are bound to get hurt.
To avoid awkwardness during and after the wedding:
- Limit the groomsmen to family only if you have a large group of friends
- Offer another position like the usher or someone who gives a toast to those left out
- Remind those who feel left out that they are still your friend and you value them
Final Thoughts
You aren’t alone if you don’t have friends to be your bridesmaids or groomsmen.
Many grooms find themselves stuck with this part of wedding planning.
Thankfully, you can explore several options as we’ve listed above. And always remember you can do without these people.